It’s all over, baby

No surprises with the hCG last night: down to 19. All I can say, at least it’s decisive. There is pretty much nothing worse than sitting at home, cramping up a storm, waiting to start bleeding… all just two weeks before Christmas. On the other hand, the hCG could be holding steady, which would be a terrible thing. I like action; any decision made and action taken makes me feel like I’m moving forward. Ditched the hormones last night and I can’t think of anything more decisively condemning for the fetus than that. (Yeah, it’s sad but necessary.)

I’ve had tremendous support through all this and I am so, so grateful. Although… here’s a statement from my neurotic friend E- that is always crabbing about something (I have never met anyone who complains so much): “…at least it’s not as painful as labour.” Can you imagine?!  I swear, some people cannot extract themselves out of their view of their surroundings, events or friends. Everything has to relate back to them. Oh, poor her! She’s gone through something worse, so I can feel better about  myself. Well, I told her that after labour, she got a healthy baby and I’m not actually getting anything. Contrast that to another friend that has two sons and also had a miscarriage. Her advice was totally practical: Tylenol 3, granny pads, a good bottle of wine and cuddling with the husband. And, she calls or emails every day to check in. I never knew she was so sweet.

I’m actually laughing at myself at the moment. I’ve got these humongous granny pads — they actually add an inch to you bum when you’re sitting down! I don’t think I’ve seen or used pads like these since I first got my period more than 25 years ago. At least the packaging these days is smarter.

Anyway, this is a short post. I have to call my OB’s office now to see what the next step is. I still don’t have full u/s results and it’s driving me crazy. But I’m trying to chill….

Hope you all are doing well. I’m going to go ’round and check on you all, on your blogs, later today.