Blast Off!

November 25, 2009

Sorry I haven’t updated about the actual transfer, but with all the action and excitement, then long trip back home and catching up with work, I have been slightly distracted.

Long story short, we wound up with five blasts! We’ve never had five blasts. One time we had one embryo struggle to day five but it didn’t survive thawing. Yesterday I read an article about ultra deep sea life, like micro-celled organisms, tiny worms and sea cucumbers that live hundreds of meters below the ocean and subsist on crazy stuff like oil that has spilled and sunk. If those creatures have some sense of how to evolve, what life is, then our embryos do too. Yet I don’t think of them as human and very far from a fetus. They are literally organisms that cannot be seen by the naked eye. It’s strange to think that this potential baby could evaporate after sitting in the deep freeze for a few months. On the other hand, we release thousands of eggs over our lifetime and we still only have a 20 percent chance of conceiving naturally in any given year (before 35). So lots of our eggs, even if they become embryos (a chemical pregnancy, let’s say) also melt away.

Alright, long digression. The chances with a DE are 50 percent with two embryos, but that carries a 20 percent risk of multiples. The thought of multiples scares me. I’ve seen a few friends with babies in the NICU and I don’t want to go down that road. So I chose to transfer one blast and that gives me about a 30 percent chance with extremely low multiple rate. I’ll know next week.

In the meantime, I’ll bury myself in work, work, work. Even though there’s a teeny part of me that just doesn’t care about work any more. All I care about is having this baby. Hopefully.

Who else is in the waiting game? The dreaded TWW? How do you balance what you think your life will be soon, and what it is now? It’s impossible to make plans, isn’t it?