Despite the fact that I might not actually need an OB after tomorrow, I decided that I’d go on the hunt for one. It’s a blood sport in this town. They are all so overbooked. One that I called (came highly recommended by a friend and has a 4.7 rating on RateMD) is taking patients with a delivery date starting in August. I can just barely slip into her schedule. So I booked her. I mean, I don’t get to see her until 3 months anyway and if I have to postpone, then at least I’m sort of in the door.

One of my friends thinks I am making a mistake. Well, not a mistake per se, but she thinks I should book with a different doctor (he got a 5.0 rating and my sister went to him but his receptionist is a b****!) because his hospital has a tunnel to a kids’ hospital next door so if anything should happen, it could be a lifesaver. This does make sense to me but I feel badly about the first doctor, who seems like she’d be really nice. No final decision yet but clearly I don’t have time to languish.

The advice I received from every single female friend I have who has kids is, call several doctors even before you get a positive result. Literally on day of ovulation or retrieval or transfer and give them the approximate date (lie if you have to, they said!) because otherwise you may be really truly stuck.Talk about more stress.

I learned another neat trick: make sure your referring doctor indicates you’re high risk. That way you’ll get priority treatment and the OB’s staff will actually return your calls. They’ll also fit you in whenever necessary, unlike a regular low-risk pregnancy. What surprised me is that my donor clinic does not consider me — or most “regular” patients — as high risk.

While I was on the RateMD site, I looked up my fertility doctor from the second clinic I went to — and wasted three years with. She and her partner are some of the lowest rated fertility docs in this town. Comments consistently say that patients are made to feel like numbers, lack of confidentiality, and not listening to the patient or explaining consequences of treatment or drugs. More seriously, someone else had a similar experience as I did where the doctor prescribed meds “just in case” even though tests showed no underlying condition existed.

So there you go, ladies! One more thing to think about and sort out while you’re in the very busy throes of IVF.